1. God First
In Genesis 37-42, Joseph is a great example of a man who remained consistent in his relationship with God. Whether a slave managing a household, a prisoner working in jail, or a ruler helping to save a nation from starvation, Joseph always prioritized his relationship with God over everything else. This not only speaks to consistency, but also priorities. When I show my kids that I love God more than sports, sleeping in, or the television, it has a powerful impact on both my spiritual life and my kids.
2. Gives Up Rights
When Abraham gives Lot first choice of the land in Genesis 13, the Lord blesses him and takes care of him. Abraham had the right to pick the best piece, but he valued his relationships more. Giving up my fatherly rights could be as innocuous, yet powerful, as offering the gooiest cinnamon roll or the thickest steak to my kids. It’s powerful when kids see their father choose them. As a dad, I am called to lead my family, but that’s different than demanding ‘it’s my way or the highway’. Taking opportunities to put my wife and kids above myself will remind them of God’s selfless love.
3. Admits Failure
David famously (or infamously) made a tragic mistake with Bathsheba in 2 Samuel 11. The fact that David not only took rebuke but confessed and repented in chapter 12 shows the depths of humility David emulated before the entire kingdom.
I don’t like to be wrong. Or to fail. I certainly don’t want others to know about it. However, there is rarely a more powerful moment than when I take advantage of the opportunity to apologize to my children. My kids also have the opportunity to practice the art of forgiveness when I allow confession and repentance to be a part of our relationship.
4. Models
I love the example Boaz gives us in the book of Ruth. He had fallen in love and wanted to marry Ruth, but given their customs and laws, there was another who had first dibs but didn't know it. Boaz chose to model integrity by bringing the matter up to him and abiding by their laws. Even though this might have meant losing Ruth to the other man. It's easy to tell kids how to behave. It's harder to model a life of total integrity.
Children are always watching.
When someone cuts me off in traffic. When my order is wrong. When I am running late. When I’m tired. When I REALLY want something. They are watching how I act. They see what I am willing to do to get my way. They will follow what they see far more than what I say.
5. Fully Present
One of my favorite (and convicting) stories is Matthew 19:13-15. The disciples felt that Jesus would be bothered by the kids looking for his attention. However, Jesus’ response was to stop everything and spend time with the children. He recognized their value and gave them his time and attention. I should be following this example. I need to be FULLY PRESENT. In a society that tries to keep me busy and distracted every microsecond of the day, a quick glance up or a reply of ‘in a minute’ seem to be my go-to response with my kids. The most loving thing I can do for my children is to be there for them. FULLY PRESENT. To listen to them, to see them, to learn about them, to respond to them in the moment, to share time together. Kids are begging parents to look up from their phones and ‘watch me’ at the playground. To share their schoolwork or pictures that they bring home. The time has come to decide exactly what sort of father I want to be. A bare minimum, distracted dad, or a reflection of my Heavenly Father, ready to forsake all for the sake of my precious child.